Seinfeld Quotes and Quotation

• "I always get the feeling that when lesbians look at me, they're thinking, "That's why I'm not a heterosexual."" -- George Costanza

• "We're not gay! Not that there's anything wrong with that" -- George Costanza and Jerry Seinfeld

• "You're black. You said we were an interracial couple."
  "We are. Because you're Hispanic."
  "I am?"
  "Aren't you?"
  "No. Why would you think that?"
  "Your name's Benes, your hair, and you kept taking me to those Spanish restaurants."
  "That's because I thought you were black."
  "Why would you take me to a Spanish restaurant because I'm black?"
  "I don't think we should be talking about this."
  "So, what are you?"
  "I'm white."
  "So, we're just a couple of white people?"
  "I guess."
  "Oh."
  "Yeah. So do you want to go to the Gap?"
  "Sure."

• "SAY VANDELAY! SAY VANDELAY!!!!!" George says, running out of the bathroom in his underpants, and falls on the floor as Jerry walks in
  "And you want to be my latex salesman."

• "He's a re-gifter and a de-gifter and now he's using an upstairs invite to springboard into a Super Bowl sex romp!" Jerry referring to dentist Tim Whatley

• "Newman!"

• "For I am Costanza, Lord of the Idiots" - George Costanza

• "That's totally inappropriate. It's lewd, vesivius, salacious, outrageous!" - Jackie Chiles

• "You put the balm on? Who told you to put the balm on? I didn't tell you to put the balm on. Why'd you put the balm on? You haven't even been to see the doctor. If your gonna put a balm on, let a doctor put a balm on." - Jackie Chiles

• "When you control the mail, you control information." - Newman

• "Let's just replace 'hail of shrapnel' and 'scar tissue' with 'string of pearls' and 'raspberry scones'." -Elaine Benes

• "The sea was angry that day, my friends!" George Costanza

• "A George divided against itself... cannot stand!" George Costanza

• "And then something happened that changed us in a very profound way." "Well, what happened?" "He spit on us."

• "The sea was angry that day my friend, like an old man retourning soup at a deli." George Costanza

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